1. The overly confident, beautiful guys who know they're beautiful and walk up to me breathing testosterone into each word they utter with phrases like, "I know you want me. Why don't you just have my babies right now?" To which my response is invariably, "Barf! Can you lean your head back so I can more easily punch you in the throat?"Or
2. The super nice, sweet, innocent, good guy that is about as exciting as paper. To which my response is, "Do you have anything
sharp in your pocket? I want to see how quickly I can slit my own wrists and bleed out."Why does it seem too much to ask to find a guy who is capable of making me laugh - not smile, not simper, not occasionally chuckle...I mean full on laugh my guts out, guffaw! Now I don't require that he make me laugh that hard all the time, of course, just knowing he has that ability is enough. There are plenty of amusing guys out there, it's true. I can smile or even laugh at them (or with them, rather), but my heart isn't in it. Correction, my brain isn't in it.
I'm not saying I'm some kind of philosophical genius that is so far above mere mortal humor that I cannot find any amusement in the things people say or do. FAR from it. Anyone who knows me, knows that I love to laugh and that I can laugh quite easily. I'm just saying that for whatever reason, it is rare to find my brand of humor - which, by the way, welcomes awkward nerdiness, puns (good AND bad), corny jokes, good, intelligent wit, and even the occasional slightly ribald joke. So I laugh, but my brain may not be in it. To me, a good sense of humor is evidence of a sharp mind - one capable of both levity and thoughtful discussion on a variety of topics. I just can't figure out why it's been such a long time since I have really, truly laughed.
This morning I was thinking about this some more and it reminded me of a particular Grimm's fairy tale, the Boy Who Went Forth To Learn Fear. Follow the link to read the full version, but in short it's about a boy who is too "foolish" to know when to be afraid, but really he's just wise enough not to lose his wits when faced with all kinds of frightening creatures and challenges. In the end he wins riches and marries a princess, but still hasn't learned to shudder. At last, the only way he learns to shudder and shake is when his wife pours a bucket of minnows over him in his bed. I wonder. Am I a bit like the boy who went forth to learn fear? Instead of wanting to learn fear, I want to learn to laugh. Why can't anyone make me laugh, dangit? Am I too foolish to know how to laugh or is my foolishness actually protecting me from falling for a bunch of inflated egos and bland personalities? Even if my "foolishness" helps me meet a good guy, will he have to dump a bucket of fish over my head to get me to realize that love him?
I anticipate that this post might be met with any number of reactions. Let me just apologize if anything I say here is offensive. Keep in mind that I'm using this as a way of venting, so while it does reflect how I actually feel, I may or may not be exaggerating a thing or two for literary effect. (And let me just add here, that the picture above is just a silly illustration. I like nerds. I am a self-professed nerd, therefore, it would hardly behoove me to shun my own kind. I just desire the kind of nerd that can also make me genuinely laugh!) And I know that I might be "asking for it" here, but I'm really curious. What are your thoughts on my "little defect"? Do any of you deal with something similar?
