Magic i8ball

A great big THANKS to Sara, Becky and Michelle, I've decided to do my own version of this fun little survey. It's like those silly surveys that your friends email you with questions like, "What kind of pants are you wearing right now? and Who is the most likely to respond to this email?" Boring. This is way cooler! A friend said that this is like a Magic 8-ball for iPods. Seems fitting. Okay, so I did it twice, because honestly, I didn't understand all of my first round of answers. I'm sure it's technically cheating...but my answers below are a combination of my first and second rounds with this little game. Sorry if I offend any of you iPod Shuffle Gama purists!

Well, what are you waiting for? Follow the directions below and enjoy!

Directions: Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. No cheating.

How am I feeling today? This Woman's Work - Pressed in a Book - The Shins (Ugh! SO TRUE! I have a bunch of reading to finish and then more reading to look forward to!)

Will I get far in life? My Finest Hour - The Sundays (Hm, not bad.)

How do my friends see me? #1 Ashes to Ashes - David Bowie, #2 Cruel Summer - Bananarama (So either my friends see me as a dead, reformed drug addict or a cruel summer...uhhh. Neither says much for me.)

When will I get Married? (Both times gave me cryptic answers, you decide what they mean, because they're totally confusing to me.) #1 I Still Feel the Same About You - Ella Fitzgerald & Friends, #2 You've Got a Friend - James Taylor

What's my theme song? You Give Love a Bad Name - Bon Jovi (Ha ha! Maybe that's my answer to the previous question? My second attempt was strange. It's a song in Latvian called Dark Night, Green Grass...hmmm.)

What is the story of my life? Bermuda Triangle - Barry Manilow (Yes, I know. I have Barry Manilow on my iPod. Story of my life, I get it. 'Nuff said.)

How can I get ahead in life? #1 Don't Leave Home - Dido (Okay. So I'm going to become a successful recluse. How nice for me.) #2 Living in Oblivion - Anything Box (Um, apparently I'm not exactly looking toward a stellar future here.)

What is my best feature? Stay - Shakespeare's Sister (Wha?)

How is today going to be? You're the Voice - Heart (Again...wha?)

What is in store for this weekend? #1 Nothing Better - Postal Service, #2 Joy - The Sundays (I had to share both, since this weekend is my birthday! Thank you, oh wise iPod, for promising me a great birthday weekend!!)

What is my life like at the moment? Everybody Wang Chung - Wang Chung (I just think that everybody should wang chung, okay? I'm chunging wang right now, are you?)

What song describes my secrets? Meet James Ensor - They Might Be Giants (So my secrets resemble a reclusive Belgian painter? "...he lived with his mother and repeated himself..." Ooookay.)

What is my current lover like? #1 Missionary Man - Eurythmics (Ha, ha, ha!! Oh I hope not. Well, I mean I hope he's not a missionary right now...I'm turning 30, you see...) #2 Heavenly - Harry Connick Jr. (That's more like it!)

What song will they play at my funeral? Burning Love - Travis Tritt (Okay then!)

How does the world see me? (You Make Me Feel Like A) Natural Woman - Aretha Franklin (Awesome. It's nice to know that I make the world feel like a natural woman.)

Will I have a happy life? (Okay this one is equally confusing and disturbing.) #1 You And Me And The Bottle Makes 3 - Big Bad Voodoo Daddies, #2 The Magdalene Laundries - The Chieftains w/ Joni Mitchell (song about an unwed mother being sent to work in the laundries at the Magdalene Convent. I don't want to end up a drunk, unwed mother!)

What do my friends really think of me? Blackbird - Sarah McLachlan (Is that anything like a black sheep?)

Do people secretly lust after me? (Contradicting answers.) #1 I am a Man of Constant Sorrow - John Hartford, #2 Doors of Your Heart - English Beat

Will I accomplish my goals in life? The Stranger - Billy Joel (So...no?)

Will I find true love? #1 Boadicea - Enya (I took this to mean that I will either find true love in Ireland or that it's all Gaelic to me!) #2 Purple Toupee - They Might Be Giants (Hee hee. I just thought this was funny.)

How do I treat others? Thanks a Million - Louis Armstrong (Sweet!)

What's in a name?

"That which we call a rose by any other word would smell as sweet." Right? Hm.

Okay, this is just a continuation of the comments on my last blog...they seemed to be taking on a life of their own, so I put it to you. Have you ever had your name butchered? Why? Is it an unusual name, spelling or pronunciation? Was it accidental? Was it on purpose? What about nicknames?

I have to admit that I never had a big problem with this growing up (other than being called lots of clever names that had absolutely nothing to do with my name by my siblings). I have one of the most pedestrian names around, I think. I like it. I do. It's just pretty un-make-fun-of-able. Go ahead, give it your best shot. The worst a classmate could do when I was a kid was, "Yeah, Christina BIZZZHOP!" Yeah. I'm still reeling from that one. Please. Okay, I know I'm totally asking for it here, but Christina? Bishop? Without being blasphemous or anything...I don't really see it being easy to mock.

Okay, but I will give you my nickname from my childhood. Warning: I do this as an offer of good faith. I do know what it is to be called names, but this isn't an invitation here to do so...unless it's a really good one. So my nickname as a kid was Bina....as in Christina-bina. I was so proud of it, I would introduce myself to people, "My name's Christina, but you can call me Bina!" Yeah. Turning 30 in 7 days has re-emphasized the fact that I'm way over nicknames.

Okay...now I'm rambling. Get on with it. Let's here the name debate. Go.

The English language is NOT a toy!

An encounter with our handyman this week caused me to reassess the value of the English language in my life. I don't know, maybe it's because I got my undergrad degree in Linguistics or perhaps I'm just an English Language Nazi...you can decide, but I value the English language. My question here is, why doesn't everyone else? I mean honestly...where do some people come up with these grammatical putrefactions?

Okay. Let me first explain the encounter that sparked this tirade. It started several weeks ago when I first tried to get our handyman to come and fix my dripping bathroom sink. When he came to take a look at it, he said, "Yeah...that thar needs a new spicket. I'ma hafta run overta hardware store an' pick uppa new one." No, I'm not kidding. Now, I know that Virginia is considered (by some) to be in the South, but in what dialect does a 'g' become a 'k' and why? Vowel sound changes I can understand (mostly) and even enjoy (ah, Wisconsin!) Now this was just a one-time encounter, so I wondered if perhaps I'd heard him wrong. Well, over the course of the next few weeks, through phone calls and his final visit, I learned that the word "spicket" was a hard and fast part of this gentleman's vocabulary. I swear each time he said it, I gave myself a headache from clenching my teeth as hard as I could to keep from screaming, "SPIGOT!! The word is spiGot! With a 'G', you idiot! Or better yet, why not skip that word altogether and just call it a dang FAUCET!?!?!!!" ...deep breath...count to ten...ahhhh. I've found my happy place.

So anyway, in addition to the other embolism-producing mispronunciations that I've heard in my life, this caused me to start pondering regional accents and the strange sounds they encourage. What I've come to conclude is this...if it's a mere matter of regional accent causing the word to sound different to me, I am generally just amused (or bemused) instead of distressed. In fact, I may enjoy trying to learn how to approximate said pronunciation, because I think it's fun. (I did, in fact take a stage dialects class once...SO much fun!) However, when a person deliberately abuses the English language by using an entirely fabricated word...well, this I cannot abide. And when I say they do it deliberately...I mean it. They are deliberately trying to cause permanent damage to my delicate ears. I just know they are.

Anyway, here's a short list of both mispronunciations and accent changes that I've heard over the years. It's not very extensive, because I was drawing a serious blank as I wrote this. See if you can place them (answer key below)...

1. Supposably (supposedly)
2. Suh-um (something)
3. warsh (wash)
4. ward/warm (pronounced like the words 'hard' or 'arm')
5. ungyun (onion - this is one my mom has heard several times)
6. flag/bag (same 'a' sound as in 'age' or 'wage', sometimes as in 'egg' or 'beg')
7. ahnry (ornery - while 'awr-nuh-ree' is an accepted pronunciation, as is 'or-nuh-ree', it's rarely ever pronounced either way. YARRRGH!!!)
   
8. spicket (spigot...I think I've said enough here)

Now before anyone actually does start calling me the English Language Nazi, let me just say this. I know I'm an abuser in my own right. I have and do change, botch, mispronounce, and misspell words ALL the time. Also, English is a living language so it's bound to change and develop...but come on...I mean...COME ON! Some things are honestly just not necessary. Spicket? Really?

So what are some of your mis-pronunciation or accent-related pet peeves? Do you have an accent? Take this little quiz to find out.

Here are my results.

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The West   Your accent is the lowest common denominator of American speech. Unless you're a SoCal surfer, no one thinks you have an accent. And really, you may not even be from the West at all, you could easily be from Florida or one of those big Southern cities like Dallas or Atlanta.
The Midland
Boston
North Central
The Inland North
Philadelphia
The South
The Northeast
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Interesting. Does it mean something that my parents are from the West and that I lived there for over 6 years? I think I'm too smart for this test. (ahem)

Answer key: 1. I'm not sure...anywhere, really, but I heard it most in Utah. 2. Utah 3. Oddly, I heard this in Wisconsin, but I think it appears in some of the south and North-East. 4. Utah/Idaho 5. Utah 6. Wisconsin (Midwest) 7. West 8. Virginia (oh I do hope this is the only place!!)

That's right...time for another one

I don't mean to startle anyone by having two posts in a row...I was a little startled myself. However, I felt that these little tidbits had great need of being posted. First of all...to the toast lovers out there. (You know who you are.) I thought you might enjoy this little game. Object of the game? Not to get burned, of course! Who likes burnt toast? Blech! So here's to you toast-lovers...Yeah toast!

All I can say here is Story-ory-o! Ah, Jack Black...you make nearly everything better. Black-a-lee-doo! (I do apologize for the slightly blasphemous script topic. Ignore that part.) I mean, who better than Jack Black to spread love, peace and how to come up with a story? I kind of wish he was teaching how to write a movie theme song, though. A-scroot-a-lee-doo, a-fruit-a-lee-doo...anyone? Anyone else love that movie as much as I did? I expect all who answer this one will be female...it is most unabashedly a "chick flick" and I loved every minute of it. Remarkably, I loved it in spite of the fact that it has Cameron Diaz in it...who most often makes me want to pull out my eyelashes one by one. She was actually alright. If you haven't seen it yet...go watch it. Or come over to my house and watch it with me. I own it. :)

Okay, and one more instructional video. The 80's are officially back. That's right ladies and gentleman...it's time to find that large piece of cardboard you've been hoarding for just such an occasion, put on your finest 80's track suit and get down to it. Come on everybody! Let's make Michael proud! (Oh Michael, you're such a parody of yourself now...but at least you were still black in this video.)

So, what do you think? Do we need to have a game night with a "fight to the toast" followed by a battle of the moon walkers? Anyone with the most believable MJ moves gets equal parts admiration and horror from me. I mean, as much as I've always wanted to know all the steps to his Thriller dance, I kind of feel that the level of "dedication" it takes to learn them might speak to a greater problem. That's all I'm sayin'. On second thought...maybe we could just re-enact this "version" of the Thriller dance. Oh I couldn't not put this one in here. This is for all you fans of bollywood. I haven't stopped laughing yet. (Killer! Killer!)

Exactly 27.5 days left of my twenties

That's right! Can you believe it? Well, I can't. I mean, I swear it was just yesterday that I was dying to get in to my twenties...and now I'm about to leave them. Huh. Odd. When did getting older stop being fun? I suspect it was around the same time that I stopped believing in Santa Claus. I'm not entirely sure how they're related, but it just seems to make sense. But I mean, don't you remember just waiting for the day that you would be "older" so that you could do all the things you weren't allowed to do? Being the youngest of six, I was keenly aware of how being older also meant having so many more privileges. I could hardly wait. So, now that this "getting older" thing is breathing down my neck, you may ask how I feel about this transition. No, go ahead, it's okay. Ask me. Perhaps something like this?

Well to be honest, I think I freaked out more when I turned 29. That may seem a bit strange, but I think now that I've had a year to get used to the idea that I'll no longer be in my twenties...yeah, that's a lie. It's freaked me out the whole time, but ya know, it's just a number. And as I was just reminded of the other day, I don't "look" 30...whatever that means. I mean, I suppose that's a blessing...or will be once I really start getting old (Definition of "old" being relative to whatever you believe is old. Ha!). This may sound cliche, but something my grandma said was that you're only as old as you feel. When she was probably in her 80s or 90s, she told me that she would often walk past the mirror and wonder, "Who's that old lady?" So, if that's true, then I'm really only about 21. Woohoo!! I've got everything to look forward to again! Finishing my undergrad degree...going on a mission...getting my first professional job...starting grad school...etc., etc., etc. Which reminds me...while I was surfing around on the internet for things to link to this message, I found an article that first reminded the reader that, "Unless you make it into one, turning 30 is not a death sentence". I can agree with that. I mean, isn't 30 the new 20? The writer of this article also advised those turning 30 to ignore all of the annoying articles with titles like "100 Things You Simply Must Accomplish Before You Turn 30!". To those articles I say, "Bah! Baloney!" Something that it did, in fact, suggest was to think of all the things you have accomplished in your life by this time and to list them. I liked that idea. So here goes...

• I earned my high school diploma, an Associate Degree in German and a Bachelor's in Linguistics, with a Minor in TESOL and I began my Masters degree in Folklore
  
• I've lived in Wisconsin, Idaho, Latvia, Utah and Virginia
• I've learned new skills like basket-weaving, how to speak using various dialects for the stage, how to speak Latvian and Latvian Sign Language and I've studied a small handful of other random languages
  
• I served an 18 month full-time mission to Latvia for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
• I have visited Germany, Austria, Latvia, England, Finland, Lithuania, Estonia, Italy, France and numerous U.S. States
• I have read oh...I don't know some 5000 books (this is a guesstimation, but I'm going for my whole life...so maybe it should be higher. I don't know.)
  
• I have seen some 3 billion films (maybe a slight exaggeration, but it doesn't feel like it)
• I have become an aunt 19 times over
• I have gained many lasting and life-changing friendships
• I have been on hundreds of dates (I was debating whether this was an actual accomplishment or merely a matter of course...jury's still out.)
• I bought my first car (ok, well it almost looked like that)
  
• I traded-in my first car
  
• I bought my first "real" car
• I started a blog
  

Well, that's it, in a nutshell...sorry if I'm missing anything glaringly huge. If so, I'll insert an addendum or something. Now, you may not be as close to turning 30 as I am, but what have you accomplished in your years? Go ahead, toot your own horn for a minute.

And one more thing...any birthdays that gave you cause to pause and wonder...what the? When did I get this old? Good. Let's hear it.